


Happy Birthday To Me

by chelsaofbakerst (ChelsaOfBakerStreet)



Category: Glee RPF
Genre: 21st Birthday, Alcohol, Birthday Sex, M/M, Party Bus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-25
Updated: 2011-06-27
Packaged: 2017-11-09 15:48:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/457224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChelsaOfBakerStreet/pseuds/chelsaofbakerst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Chris' 21st birthday and Darren wants to make it exceptionally special.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Happy Birthday" Darren smiled, clinking a glass down in front of Chris. 

"What's this?" Chris asked, looking at the glass suspiciously.

"Diet Coke of course, silly."

Chris swirled the seemingly harmless liquid in the glass before taking a gulp. He almost sprayed it back out all over Darren as his throat began to sting. He swallowed quickly before sending daggers at Darren and forcing himself not to dump the contents of the glass on Darren's head.

Darren looked up innocently, "oh, I think I may have forgotten to mention there may be a little Crown Royal mixed in."

"A little?" Chris growled. "Darren, we're getting ready to go on stage!”

Darren grinned as he left the room. "See you on stage in a bit!"  
************************  
Chris was finishing his hair while Darren sat on the counter, kicking his feet back and forth. “Come on Chris, I’m bored.”

“Oh stop acting like such a two year old Darren.” He turned around, hands on his hips, and cocking an eyebrow. “So, how do I look?”

“Fine now come on! You’re going to be late to your own party!”

“Just…fine? Also Darren, I don’t think one can be late to their own party…”

Darren hopped off the counter and slid his arms around Chris’ waist, pulling him to him and whispering in his ear. “You look good enough to take right here on this counter and if we weren’t supposed to be on the bus in five minutes that’s exactly what I would do.”

Chris swallowed and let out a slow breath, his eyes widening as Darren stared at him, his eyes dark with lust. “Um, right, like you said, they’re waiting for us.”

Darren released his hold on Chris, pulling away after placing a soft kiss on his lips. He intertwined his hand with Chris’ and led him out of the concert hall and to the bus. They unclasped their hands before climbing through the door, their relationship still secret from everyone else. As soon as Chris made it through the door he was being passed around for hugs and a glass was being pressed into his hand by Mark. “What’s this?” Chris asked, eyeing the brown liquid suspiciously. 

“Whiskey my dear boy! Meet your new friend, Jack Daniels!” Mark answered, clapping Chris on the back.

“You can’t start him off with whiskey Mark!” Naya howled, obviously she had already had a few drinks, Chris saw.   
Chris closed his eyes and brought the glass to his lips, knocking the glass back. His eyes watered as the whiskey burned down his throat, leaving a hot trail. As soon as one glass was emptied, another was placed in his hand. This time Amber had sweetly handed over a margarita in attempts of keeping Chris out of trouble for a little while. Chris tipped the glass and drank half in one gulp as the lights were flipped off and the neons flipped on, music beginning to pump into the speakers.

Chris downed the rest of the drink in another large gulp, the tequila stinging. Chord busted, crowing that he had found the glow sticks and tossing them to everyone. Chris looked around as everyone began dancing; sending looks his way to make sure he had a drink in his hand. Kevin and Harry came over to him, bearing shot glasses and a bottle of Vodka. “You up for some shots to get you loose before you hit the dance floor?” Kevin asked, wagging his eyebrows up and down.

“You only turn twenty one once, right?” Chris grinned, a slight buzz starting to settle over his brain. He grabbed the first shot Kevin poured, the alcohol stinging less as his throat began to numb. He was on his third shot when Darren sidled over, grabbing the bottle before Harry could set them up for round four. 

“I’m stealing Chris for a minute if that’s ok boys. He needs to dance.”

“Darren you know I can’t dance” Chris giggled, but allowed himself to be pulled into the crowd of bodies.

Darren pulled Chris to him, dancing against him, as he whispered softly in his ear “that is a lie Christopher Paul Colfer. I have seen you do the ‘Single Ladies’ dance and I know damn well you can dance.” 

Chris grinned down at Darren, “I knew you watched me while I was onstage you perv.”

“Oh trust me Chris, watching you isn’t all I do.” With those words Darren arched his hips up towards Chris, his erection rubbing against Chris’ ass.

“Fuck Darren. You can’t just do that!”

“Yes I can and if you keep swearing in that voice I am going to do it more because I can’t help it.”   
Darren grinned as Lady Gaga’s ‘Bad Romance’ came blasting through the speakers. Naya and Heather started grinding against each other amidst catcalls and cheers from the boys. Lea, who had most likely already put down more drinks than Chris, pulled Dianna to the circle, competing with Naya and Heather. Darren didn’t mind that the attention had switched from Chris to the girls for the time being; in fact he was thankful for it. He nuzzled his head against Chris’ neck, pressing wet kisses to his neck, sucking lightly on the skin.

Chris let out a small moan and pressed backward into Darren, his hips moving to the beat of the music. Darren grabbed Chris’ hip, pulling him flush with his body and grinding up against him. Chris wasn’t sure whether it was hormones or the alcohol talking, but he moved along with Darren, the blood rushing to his cock making him slightly dizzy. 

Darren grasped onto Chris’ hips harder, his fingers digging into the soft flesh as Chris stumbled slightly, then quickly regained his composure. Darren used the cover of the guys yelling as the song came to a close to whisper dirtily in Chris’ ear. “Keep grinding on me like this and I’ll be coming soon.” He accentuated his words with a quick thrust of his hips, his hard cock pressing through his jeans into Chris’ thigh. 

Darren relinquished his hold on Chris as 3OH!3’s ‘Starstrukk’ came flying out of the speakers, the bass throbbing in his ears. “You aren’t drunk enough; people will think I’m not doing my job!”

Chris tilted his head questioningly. “And what exactly is your job Darren?’

“I am the numero uno person in charge of making sure you get completely shitfaced.”

“They left you in charge of that? Why not Mark or Kevin?”

“What? You think I can’t party Colfer?” Darren sneered, pulling a bottle out of his jacket. “I’ll bet your pretty white ass that I can take more shots off this bottle of Crown Royal than you.”

“Darren, stop for a moment, you’ve been drinking a lot longer than me.”

“And your point?”

“Obviously you can take more hits than me!” Chris answered, smacking Darren on the arm. Chris lowered his eyes and Darren could swear a blush spread on his face. “Also” Chris began in a voice so light Darren had to strain to hear him over the music. “There’s something else, I’d uh, really like to do for my birthday and I’d really like to not be so drunk I don’t remember it.”

Darren’s heart sped up slightly and he had to grab the table to keep from falling over. “Chris, everyone is hell bent on getting you drunk out of your mind and you want to try and stay somewhat sober? How are you going to pull it off?”

“Listen, I know this bus is stocked with Diet Coke, I made sure of it before we left. Dump out a bottle of something and pour some Diet Coke in its place. That way it’ll look like you’re doing your job, and I can just act drunk.” Chris grinned devilishly at Darren who was still trying to remember how to breathe.

“Yeah, ok that might work.” Darren headed over to the bar, pouring out the Crown Royal, flinching as he did so, that stuff was expensive, but this was so fucking worth it. He crouched behind the mini bar as he grabbed a can of Diet Coke and popped the tab. As he poured he mulled over what Chris had just said. Chris wanted to have sex with him. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to, because damn, he wanted to, but he didn’t want Chris to be pressured into it. They hadn’t done much of anything, somehow usually being split up in the hotel. Darren wondered whether Chris had pulled some strings to get them a room together tonight. 

Darren walked back over to the table after hiding away the empty can and set the bottle of “Crown Royal” on the table with a hollow thunk. “Ok Colfer, rum time!” Darren announced, loud enough that everyone could hear. Chord and Mark grabbed a bottle of Vodka and sat at the table with Chris and Darren. 

“For every shot you two take, we’ll take one too. Got it?” Mark said, pouring the liquid into his and Chord’s glasses.

“You got it.” Darren grinned, smiling over at Chris while pouring their drinks. 

“On the count of three!” Naya screeched, joining the party at the table, holding a wine cooler. “One. Two. THREE!”

On the three all four boys tipped their glasses back, letting their hands fall heavily on the table. “All right!” Mark yelled. “Time for round two!”  
*******  
Halfway through the bottle of Vodka, Mark fell off his chair, laughing at a joke had told. Chris and Darren should have won Emmy’s for their acting because no one had figured out that they were indeed, 100% sober now. Lea had slipped off somewhere with two margaritas and Naya was sitting on Cory’s lap, who was staring at her as if she were an alien. 

“Well boys,” Darren said grinning, remembering to slur his words slightly. “I think it’s time for me to get Chris here to bed.”

“But I don’wanna go to bed” Chris whined. “I need more alcohol!” Chris was slumped over in the seat, biting his lip to keep from laughing and Darren just wanted to pick him up and carry him to the nearest solid object and screw him senseless. No, he reminded himself; that would be irresponsible.

“Seriously though guys, I think I need to get him to the room before he passes out and I have to carry his ass all the way back to the hotel.”

“Excuse me Mr. Criss but this ass is all muscle so there.” Chris giggled, falling over on the table even more. 

Mark gave Chris a once over then turned back to Darren. “Yeah, I see what you mean. It’s getting pretty late anyway; we all probably need to sleep soon.” 

Darren tugged on Chris’ arm. “Come on you lush, get your ass up, we’re going back to the room.”

“But there’s still rum left” Chris pouted, pretending to resist against Darren.

“You can have the rum tomorrow, now let’s go.”

“Yes mom” Chris grumbled, but allowed Darren to pull him up, throwing an arm around the shorter boy’s shoulders.

Darren waved goodnight to them all and staggered with Chris out the door. They made it across the parking lot and through the doors of the hotel before they burst out laughing. “You my friend,” Darren grinned, throwing an arm around Chris’ waist “we’re absolutely magnificent. All the fucking awards to you Chris.”

“Hey you weren’t too shabby yourself” Chris laughed, poking Darren in the ribs. 

An uncomfortable silence filled the elevator as the doors slid closed. Chris couldn’t keep his eyes off of Darren, from the tightest pair of jeans he had ever seen on the boy to the grey cardigan pulled taut across his chest. It was quiet enough that Chris could swear he could hear Darren’s heartbeat racing, his breathing coming in raspy, shallow gasps. He opened his mouth to speak but the ding of the elevator stopping him and then they were making their way to their room. 

“Chris” Darren spoke suddenly.

Chris turned to see Darren stopped a few feet behind him. “What?” he asked, walking back towards the other boy.

Darren grabbed Chris’ hand and pulled him towards him. “Happy birthday” was all he said, and then kissed him, deep and needy. Chris tangled a hand into Darren’s hair as Darren wrapped his arms around him, pushing them down the hall and towards their room. They were a tangle of limbs, hands roaming across bodies, tongues entangling with each other. Darren pushed Chris up against the door, reaching between them for the keycard. He slid it into the slot on the door and waited for it to beep before throwing open the door and pushing Chris inside. 

They made their way clumsily into the room, Chris walking backwards until his knees hit the bed, sending him tumbling backwards and bringing Darren down with him. Darren landed on top of him and Chris instinctively bucked up into him as Darren’s erection came in contact with his own. 

“Fuck” Darren moaned, “I’m so damn close already Chris and we just got up here.”

Instead of answering, Chris pulled Darren back down to him, kissing him, tasting the lingering alcohol on his tongue. “Shut up and fuck me Darren, please.”

Darren didn’t need to be asked twice. He slid off Chris’ shirt, his hands rough and hot against Chris’s soft skin. He bent over and lapped at one of Chris’ nipples, causing Chris to moan and squirm beneath him. “You’re so fucking hot” Darren growled, as he began undoing Chris’ pants. He slid the jeans down and off of Chris’ legs and then rid himself of his own clothes, tugging his shirt over his head and kicking off his jeans. 

He climbed back on top of Chris, straddling him as he palmed Chris through his boxers. “Fuck Darren, I need you in me now” Chris groaned, his voice husky. 

Darren grabbed the elastic of Chris’ boxers and pulled them swiftly down, releasing Chris’ cock. “So hot,” Darren moaned before bending and licking the head. Chris bucked up into Darren’s mouth, the tension building in the pit of his stomach. Darren sucked lightly on Chris’ cock, running his tongue alone the vein on the bottom that turned Chris into a moaning puddle beneath him.

Chris gave out a small whimper as Darren pulled off his cock and stood up to fish something out of his suitcase. Darren returned, climbing on top of Chris once more as he dabbed a liberal amount of lube on his fingers. He slid a finger around Chris’ entrance, teasing him before slowly sliding a finger in. Chris winced at the slight pain but relaxed as Darren started moving his finger in and out. “Fuck Darren, more” Chris begged, rocking his hips down slightly. Darren added another finger, slowly stretching Chris and he hooked his fingers inward, brushing against Chris’ prostate. “God yes, right there Darren, more please.”

Darren palmed himself with his free hand, turned on even more by Chris’ begging. He slowly added a third finger, the speed of his thrusts matching the pumps of his hand around his cock. By the time he added a fourth finger into Chris his cock was aching for release, dripping pre cum. Darren slid his fingers out of Chris who made a small whimpering sound at the loss of Darren’s fingers inside of him. 

Darren stepped out of his boxers, and tore open the condom before sliding it onto his cock. He climbed onto the edge of the bed and pulled Chris towards him, his fingers digging into Chris’ ass. He lined his cock up with Chris’ entrance and slowly pushed in. Chris grabbed fistfuls of the sheets as Darren filled him, stretching him like never before. Darren paused momentarily as he waited for Chris to nod. Chris looked into Darren’s eyes as he slowly began to rock in and out of him. Darren wrapped a hand around Chris’ cock, keeping pace with his thrusts. 

Darren leaned over, capturing Chris’ mouth with his, sucking on his tongue. Chris wrapped a hand around Darren’s neck and Darren continued to thrust into him, his hand still pumping Chris’ cock. Chris felt the heat pooling in his stomach and knew he wouldn’t last much longer. “Darren” he panted, pressure building up inside his body, “I’m about to come.” 

Darren quickened his pace, squeezing the base of Chris’ cock as Chris released, cum spattering over their chests with a cry of Darren’s name escaping his lips. Darren’s eyes widened as he called Chris’ name, his release happening. 

Darren slowly pulled out of Chris, who felt empty once Darren was gone from inside of him. Darren stripped off the condom, tying it and throwing it into the waste basket before rolling over and pulling Chris to him. Chris rolled over to face Darren, his hair disheveled and a large hickey starting to form on his neck. “Thanks for a wonderful birthday Darren.”

“Anything for you Chris” Darren smiled, kissing him on the lips. “I love you, you know that?”

“Love you too Darren” Chris said, snuggling into Darren’s arms. “We can clean up in the morning, I’m tired and you’re comfortable.”

“Sounds good to me” Darren laughed, pulling Chris into his arms.  
***************************  
The next morning Chris stepped outside the room to run downstairs and grab a couple of muffins for him and Darren who was showering. As he stepped across the threshold he almost fell over something on the floor. He bent over and picked up the Crown Royal bottle from the night before. Realization of what this meant dawned on him as he noticed a small card attached to the bottle. “Congrats on the sex!” it read. “Next time don’t leave your bottle of fake booze on the table with a bunch of drunken people. – Love Mark P.S. Next time you want to go have birthday sex with your hot coworker, all you have to do is say so.” Chris didn’t know if he should laugh or cry. All he knew is that he better have his game face on when he stepped into the lobby because this was going to be a birthday no one was going to let him forget.


	2. Why is All the Rum Gone?

Mark and Harry had been joined by Kevin and Chord and soon the bottle of vodka was no longer. They whined for a bit until Mark noticed the Crown Royal bottle on the floor, next to Chord’s foot. “Dude” he slurred “pass up the rum!” Chord leaned over, almost falling out of the chair as he retrieved the bottle.

“Shiiiiiiiit man! This is Crown Royal, this stuff is amazing!” Harry laughed, pulling off the top and pouring shots for them all. He grabbed his shot glass and raised it in the air. “To Chris!” He was met with glasses clinking against one another and a loud yell before they all tipped their glasses back. Mark was the first to finish his shot and coughed as he realized that the bottle held somewhat flat Diet Coke, not rum. 

“What the hell?” Kevin groaned, staring into the bottle. “Why is all the rum gone?”

“What’s going on guys?” Cory asked, walking over to the table. “Have you guys seen Chris? I was supposed to be keeping an eye on him.” 

“He left with Darren a few minutes ago. They said that Chris needed to get back to the room before he was completely shitfaced to the point he couldn’t walk,” Mark answered. “What I’m trying to figure out though is why there’s diet coke in the rum bottle.”

“There’s coke in the rum bottle?” Cory asked, brow furrowing in confusion. “Why would there be coke in the rum bottle?”

“I don’t know, I wanted rum, but no, there’s no rum” Kevin slurred, holding the bottle up in Cory’s direction.

“But if he’s not drunk then why did they go back to the room?”

Naya flung her arms over Cory and Mark’s shoulders, smiling widely. “Obviously they needed an excuse to go give Chris a special present.”

Cory’s mouth dropped open, Chord fell out of his chair and the Crown Royal bottle fell out of Kevin’s hand, clanking on the table.

“No. Fucking. Way.” Mark said, dumbstruck. “No, they can’t be.”

“Wait, we’re all talking about the same thing here right?” Cory asked, looking around the bus nervously. 

“Cory, you cannot possibly be that dumb.” Mark looked at him, taken aback.

“Well I mean, maybe Chris was sick or something and he was just trying to help him out.”

“There’s only one thing he’s helping him out with.”

“But what if he is sick or something?”

“Oh for god’s sake Cory, do you want to go check on him?”

“I mean, I’m going to go you don’t have to come.”

“I feel like you’ll need me there to pick you jaw off the floor” Mark said, grabbing the Crown Royal bottle.   
“Plus, they might need this.”

Cory, Mark and Kevin, who had decided to tag along, walked the short distance across the parking lot to the hotel. Once they were in the elevator Cory started to feel that maybe this had been a bad idea, but Mark wasn’t going to let him turn back now. “So uh, should we knock or?”

“Hell no man, we listen at the door first and then if you aren’t satisfied, you can knock on the door and annoy them.” Mark grinned, punching Cory in the arm “dude you are so taking all the blame if you interrupt them.”

The elevator doors dinged open and the three boys shuffled into the hall. Mark went first, knowing that at least if he heard something there’d be a chance to pull Cory away before he knocked on the door. They arrived in front of Chris and Darren’s room and Mark held out a hand to stop Kevin and Cory while holding a finger to his lips, signaling them to keep quiet. 

He knelt down in front of the door and slowly pressed an ear to it. He quickly drew back, a disgusted look on his face. “Oh god, ok I was proven right, come on let’s go before we get caught listening at doors.”

“You aren’t just saying that because you want to go are you?”

“No Cory, but if you still don’t believe me then press your ear to the door.”

Cory took one look at Mark before stepping forward. He had learned in the beginning you hardly ever took Mark at his word because he liked to mess with people’s heads. He pressed an ear to the door and heard nothing at first. He waited momentarily until he heard a moan that sounded very much like Chris in pain and was about to reach for the doorknob when he heard a voice that was distinctly Darren say, “fuck Chris, I can’t hold off much longer.” Cory’s eyes widened when he heard Chris answer in a voice that was so uncharacteristically him that Cory almost thought it wasn't, answer, “then don’t, come for me Darren.”

Cory tore away from the door, eyes wide and face red before turning to Kevin and Mark. “Well um, we can go back now, um, I think everything is ok in there.”

Mark gave out a small laugh while opening the door to his room. “Hold on just a second, I wanna leave something for them in the morning.” Mark grabbed a pad of paper and a pen and scribbled a short message before attaching it to the Crown Royal bottle and setting it in front of the door. “All right, let’s head back to the bus, this is going to be the best story ever!”

*****************************************  
Naya was the first one to notice Chris get off the elevator the next morning. “Guys,” she hissed, “Chris is on his way over here. Do we confront him or not?”

Mark looked at her incredulously, “are you kidding me? There is no way I am letting him get away with trying to fool us into thinking he’s drunk so he can go get laid for his birthday. He has balls though for doing it, I’ll give him that.”

Chris was wearing dark sunglasses and apparently acting like he couldn’t see the group. They all watched him grab a couple of muffins and an apple and turn to go back towards the elevator.

“Oh hell no, he is not getting off that easily,” Amber muttered. “Chris! Hey, come sit with us.” She waved to him and plastered on her sweetest smile as he turned her way.

They watched as he trudged over to the table and plopped himself down. “Hey guys what’s up?”

The table was silent for a few seconds before Mark started in on him. “So did you get my message?”

“Yes Mark, I got your message loud and clear, as long as the rest of the class doesn’t know then it’s all good.”

“Please” Naya grinned, “we all know. You thought you could pull a fast one over us Mr. Colfer but it seems you have forgotten the rest of us are seasoned drinkers unlike you. So the question remains, how was it?”

It seemed at that moment that everyone leaned in towards Chris, waiting for his answer.

“Well if you all must know I quite enjoyed my birthday and that’s all you’re getting out of me.”

“That’s not all that Darren got out of you last night” Heather said so matter-of-factly that a passer-by may have thought she was remarking about the weather.

Chris turned a bright shade of crimson, hiding his face in his hands. “You guys are never going to let me live this down are you?”

“Let you live what down?” Darren asked walking up behind him. “Hey, you weren’t in the room when I got out of the shower so I figured you came down here.” Darren turned to the rest of the cast with a smile on his face. “Hey everyone, what’s up? Did all of you have a good time last night?”

He stared in bewilderment as the entire table cracked up except for Chris who groaned and banged his head on the table.

“Yes Darren,” Kevin smiled, “we had a great time; but I’m sure it wasn’t as good as yours.” He raised an eyebrow at the boy who was now developing a flush in his cheeks as the table broke into another chorus of laughter.

“I, uh, don’t know what you’re talking about” Darren said, rubbing the back of his neck and looking of into the corner of the room.

“They know Darren. They found the bottle last night and apparently investigated.”

A look of surprise fell over Darren’s face before it relaxed into a wide grin. “Well then at least the cat’s out of the bag! Happy Birthday Chris.”

“I’d really like to smack you right now, but it’s too early, keep up the annoying though and I might just hit you later.”

“Love you too.” Darren grinned, pulling up a chair and laughing with the rest of them. 

“I hate you all” Chris murmured, letting his head drop back onto his arms. “Even you Darren, I hate you too right now.”

“That’s not what you said last night.”


End file.
